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Thursday, November 27, 2008


From the online merriam-webster.

2: having, involving, or displaying special skill or knowledge derived from training or experience.

Sounds reasonable to me. I have asked myself, and others, what makes an expert on dating or relationships. One doesn't need a degree based from this definition, but some may have a degree or two
in psychology. I'm not sure that there are any degree programs on dating anyway, maybe.

In the blogging world the word expert can often times make someone ask, "What makes you an expert?" This is a fair question, although, how would someone prove an expertise on dating anyway, unless in person?

I think reading what one has to say about the subject, and the way they present it, is really all anyone has to go on. There is a movement in cyberspace, that I guess comes from the television show "The pick up artist" that has become quite a community. They are mostly abbreviated with PUA.

Reading a little about PUA's, I have found that they have some good advice and it is quite possible that many of these PUA's are experts in the social scene. I'm sure they are not always successful at what they do, but neither is a professional basketball player, yet still professional.

I think one should keep an open mind when coming across a blog or website that lay claim to being experts. There's no skin off my nose that they call themselves experts. Besides, I have found, for the most part, that most give some really good advice.

What is your opinion about "Experts" in dating and relationships?


  1. I think in some way, we are all experts in a little bit of something here and there when it comes to relationships.

    The reason why I come and visit you all the time :) is because I think you are an expert and have a good grasp in explaining what confuses us women the most - men!

    I think your blog is one of the most entertaining relationship site that I've ever visited.

    Keep up the great work Bobby!

  2. I've been asked what makes me an expert before and, honestly, I just had to giggle. I never claimed to be one. I'm just a girl who is sharing experiences and what she has learned along the way. Mostly, I'm only an expert at what works for me, or doesn't, in relationships.

    I think that, unless there is a degree involved, most of us blogging about dating/relationships would agree that our "expertise" is really only based our own experiences.

  3. Wow Sharon, I'm blown away! Thank you so much for your kind words :) I'm certainly no expert though. One of the reasons I give for starting this blog is, "I don't blog because I know about relationships, but because I don't" But, to hear that I am helping, even a little, just makes my day! :)

    Lisa, excellent way to put it, perfect! I have come across those who do claim to be experts. They may be, but I agree with your description better :)

  4. Gosh, sounds this reads like the counterpoint to some of my musings lately. I'm with lisaq, here. I'm all for people sharing their personal experience. And I have a really low threshold for people telling others what they should do because as experts they know better.

  5. Hi SG, there are some that can be pushy about what they know, I've seen it first hand. Over all through the years, most have been humble and helpful.

    I think some of the topics we write about will be very similar as we both write about relationships. The expert topic has been on my list for a while :)

  6. I don't think having my degree in social work makes me an expert nor my 13 years in the dating service industry. When combined with my personal experiences of being married (before) and single now well let's just say I claim to have a better insight then others...I don't think I like the word expert. These new PUA's out there are amusing but I don't like the fact that they try to manipulate the natural course of dating and relationships, it should happen in a more natural way, not when one person has the upper hand. These days even a 9 year old is being considered an "expert" LOL

  7. I don't like the fact that they try to manipulate the natural course of dating and relationships, it should happen in a more natural way, not when one person has the upper hand.

    This part is very intriguing. I haven't read up enough on the PUA's to see this difference yet. I'm sure I will see it soon and also agree with you :)


Thanks so much for your comment and input! :)

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