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Thursday, March 27, 2008

Inter-racial relationships, so what?

It seems to me that most people are aware of the undesirable things in life. Part of those undesirables has to do with our differences as people. It’s bad enough when someone is killed or maimed for life because of the color of their skin, their cultural or religious beliefs, but also to be attacked because of their open-mindedness to the differences of other people seems even more outrageous.

This piece is not about all the things many of us try to heal, racism, bigotry and ignorance, but dealing more with how these things relate to inter- racial relationships.

There was a time when I was a youngster when if, for example, an IR couple walked passed a group of people, they got really nasty looks. Sometimes, even nasty things were said to them. What I can’t figure out is why the need was felt by others who didn’t know these couples, to feel as though something was wrong or even amoral about them being together. Were they doing something wrong?

My perspective on IR is pretty simple having grown up with different races and traveling to different cultures. It’s also simple because we are all human beings with feelings and have families that love us. I understand that different cultures have different values sometimes, or one value may be more important to that culture than another culture. This to me is the beauty of it. In Thailand or the Philippines, people have darker skin than I do and speak a different language also. This to me is the beauty of it. A Filipino child, when meeting an adult for the first time, will take the adults hand and put it to his forehead as a sign of respect. A Thai will bring their hands, palms together, towards their nose area in a “Wai” to show respect. A Muslim may bring his right hand over his heart when meeting a fellow Muslim. This to me is the beauty of it.

The IR couple, over the course of some time, has the opportunity to learn many of these and other cultural differences from the one they love. Do we see the beauty in that? The opportunity arises for better understanding of not just his/her culture, but a better understanding of us as individuals as well. This to me is the beauty of it. If a child is born out of love between an IR couples, what could be more beautiful? The child is blessed, not cursed, to be the child of two human beings that love each other enough to have a family regardless of skin color or eye shape. The child will grow up knowing twice as much about people and culture. And the tolerance level of this child as he/she grows into adulthood will be quite high. This to me is the beauty of it.

You love whom you love, not just for who they are, but also for whom they may not be. This is a choice we have in life. But that’s what choice is and should be embraced. So, when we see that IR couple walking down the street, let’s try to see the beauty in it.


  1. thanks for the compliment bobby, yea i hang out on MP too but not so lately I have been really busy with my blogs and other activities... youve got nice stuff to read here too. take care and enjoy blogging!!!

  2. love know boundaries, no distance, religion, race or skin color.

    nice post :)

  3. I am so glad that people are getting this. I used to date a black man, and yes the names were aweful, but we did not break up because of that.. He was just a dog! LOL!

    I have never experienced Love at all! But no matter what Love is something that is beautiful no matter what the color!!! I hope to experience that Pure Love oneday!

    G-D Bless

  4. You know Single, I wrote many replies on forums because some people had mentioned about experiencing love (Relational)or the lack of it.

    There are those that have had their hearts crushed because they had given so much love to another, only to have it taken away. You may be ahead of the game on this, so take your time.

    When love comes, you'll know it, become it and flourish with it!

  5. What a great post!
    Love IS blind..we can't help who we fall in love with, and why should it really matter anyway.
    'The beauty of it to me' are the children of these inter-racial relationships, as they are truly beautiful..an apparent blending of any two cultures.
    Well done.

  6. Hi lizh,
    Thanks so much! Your words couldn't ring any truer. I never really understood why anyone would have a problem with IR relationships, especially children that were made from love.

    Who knows, maybe one day it won't matter anymore and ignorance will take a back seat!



Thanks so much for your comment and input! :)

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