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Monday, March 17, 2008

Dating a partner with children

I have heard all my life about, “The American dream” of getting a good education, a good job, getting married and having children (A boy and a girl) and settling down in the house with a white picket fence. Not a bad dream I guess, but situations are different today than let’s say after World War 2. Divorce is high, properties are too expensive, and prices are continuously on the rise while salaries are not keeping step with inflation. It’s an ever-changing world!

Because it’s an ever-changing world (High divorce rate, tough financial times), there seem to be more single parents. This can be a factor in the dating world, a major factor! I have heard from mostly men who would rather date a lady that has no children. They have sited reasons like not wanting to raise some other guys kids, or if they are going to have to devote the time and money in raising kids, that the kids should be their own. Others, in minority, have been more positive about it saying that they would have a “Ready made family” and that appeals to them more.

For me, I never had a problem with it because children are children and they need love and guidance whether they get it from a natural parent, step parent or even long time partner. If you decide that you want to be with that person, then you are with her/his children also. I have been in that situation and there are many rewards to it as well as some testing times. All in all though, it’s a green light in my opinion.

I will also say that in same sex partnerships, it must be even more difficult when children are involved. If any readers in that situation care to give their voice on the matter, I would be very grateful!

What do you ladies think about having a relationship with a guy who has children? What problems and/or rewards do you see to this situation? Have you been in this situation before, or still, and what has it brought to your life?

Gents, your opinions are most welcome also, I just don’t have much feedback from woman on this issue.

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